Since going off to college, it's been very obvious how much more I appreciate my family than I ever have. For eighteen years I spent almost every single day around them. Never missing holidays or family functions, and never thinking twice about what life would look like once I moved out. Something I realize now, though, is that for the majority of my last year home, I wasn't living in the moment. Choosing a school to go to, moving out of the house, thinking about what my dorm room would look like, etc., consumed my life. I was so concerned about that day not coming fast enough, that I forgot to take it slow. I didn't think about not having morning chats in my pjs with my mom anymore. I didn't think about not going and getting lunch with my family, even if it were somewhere I didn't want to go. I didn't think about missing holidays, and not making it to celebrating my grandma on Mother's Day, or Thanksgiving, or Easter with the entire family. When I lived at home, there was no question about not being there. But now, life happens, and making that six hour drive home doesn't always get to happen. The year is almost over now, and I've been home twice. This year I missed Easter, I missed Mother's Day, I've missed birthdays and new family members being born. I miss having dinner with my family, and oddly, I just miss the smell of home.
I'm not saying I have regrets, or that I regret anything at all. Those few trips, the phone calls, the hugs, are worth so much more now than they ever have. I'm simply saying to appreciate it all, because now, I truly understand how much I do.
My mom asked my sisters and I what we wanted for Christmas this year (she started a group text, WHAT?!? Look at my mom being tech savvy), and each one of us responded by saying something along the lines of family time. I however, asked for a genie in a bottle. One wish, to have one solid week of time at home with my family. Even a weekend would suffice. Because nothing sounds better than enjoying my mom's pot roast with the ones I miss most.
xoxo -Alyssa
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